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Dodging the Hangover Blues
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December 31st, 2014
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Here it is. The same advice you ignored last year. And the year before…
You’ve heard it all, but public service is public service after all, so here is your yearly how-to advice on avoiding and dealing with a New Year’s Day hangover:
1. Drink a glass a water after every shot of booze.
Alternating between alcohol and water can prevent the dehydration that will make you feel like a manure sandwich with no bread come tomorrow. But are you really going to be the one swilling bottled water while dodging bottle rockets on Radhuspladsen? Didn’t think so.
2. Don’t mix your medicines.
The requisite New Year’s cocktail of champagne, Carlsberg, Jaeger, wine, body tequila and well, everything else is a guaranteed recipe for worshiping the porcelain god by 4 AM New Year’s day. But you’re gonna drink it all anyway. Probably the only time that you’ll be glad that it’s dang nigh impossible to find a late night curry in Copenhagen.
3. Eat something before you booze it up.
Ok, that’s easy. Fill up. Line your stomach. Shwarma. A Whopper. Go for it. Fitness World will be open on Friday.
4. Be a woman.
There are differing theories as to why, but women seem to get fewer and less severe hangovers than men. Around about the second hour of dry heaves, some fellas may seriously consider a sex change.
There's got to be a morning after…
While there is no scientific evidence that a anchovy pizza and a morning beer the next day will lessen the effects of the New Year’s Eve bacchanal, who really cares? The experts say that bananas, soup, yoghurt and that sort of thing are probably better, but who wants to eat that crap after a night of hard partying?
Also, some claim that you can sweat out the hangover by ringing in the New Year with a bout of hot monkey sex. That is probably a bit of wishful thinking as well, but again, who cares? The research is inconclusive, so dive in. But for God's sake, wait until you get home.
The best advice is always, well, not to drink, or at least not to drink so much. When you ignore that – and you will – your choice is to sleep off as much of the misery as you can, pop some Panodil, drink plenty of water, get some fresh air and make that resolution that you won’t be so stupid next year.
Again.
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